I don't think it's right of me to speak negatively of everything. I truly am an optimistic person. I think it has been yeeeaaaaars of questions and frustrations that I am letting spill forth. Oh man, I have been writing personal essays since I was 12. I remember writing a 2-page essay entitled "Chad" just because I thought he was the biggest poser in existance. Just an outlet for my anger. Anger is a delicious emotion and it is one of the easiest to get carried away with.
I must give credit to those who have entered my life and changed it drastically. Even if at the time it was a negative experience, I have always learned from them and have become a more aware person.
Especially these days, I have been meeting extraordinary kids my age that are feeling similar things and who are open to discussing such topics. Unfortunately, it sounds like we're just complaining (probably because we go to the same school and are stuck within the same scene).
Also, thank you to those that I've kept relationships with from my home town. The test of time has shown me that there are those who will be solid prevalent figures throughout the rest of my life.
This is a new start for me. As everyday of complaints and procrastination passes by, I feel that that is my motivation to overcome those obstacles. I need to repeat to myself what my problems are in order to get sick of them and move on.
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dammit jane, i am still in the lab at 180. it took me like an hour to figure this damn thing out, but i think i got it but now i wanna go home. [btw if you haven't figured it out yet, this is sarah].
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